Umm, the country comes with all this ... Nature?

Okay, I admit: it is one of the biggest adjustments I’ve had to make: all the noises, plants, creatures… it’s a lot for a mostly climate controlled city girl (for whom 'roughing it' was once a hotel without 24 hr room service) to adjust to all at once. Now, after 2+ weeks, I’m finally not flinching each time something flies by me, and have learned to look into the bathtub before I step in each morning (and 3 days out of 5 there is something with at least 100 legs.) Though I do resist killing them if they’re OUTSIDE. I sort of talk to them now – saying, “now, you know the rules, spiders don’t live in the house…” (as if there is a rational argument to be made with them here.)

But I have to admit, I’m fascinated by the incredible variety of new species (?) I am encountering (the scientists in the gang will correct me if that’s the incorrect use of that term…). Once I stopped being freaked out by it all, there’s some really fascinating stuff to see. I’m finding my way back to my early explorer/science student roots (you know, the ones I got in Jr. High with Mr. Fig and the gang… *before* Mrs. Woodall, that vicious psycho witch – not that I hold a grudge, HAH! - beat any passion for the sciences out of me in high school Bio… )

So today I discovered I’ve become the amateur Steve Erwin of the insect world. To wit: normal conversation with myself as I walk through the garden goes something like this: (please imagine my miserable version of a bad Aussie accent here): “now take a good gander at THIS big daddy! He’s the size of my entire THUMBNAIL! He’s a (something scientific-sounding) beetle, which you can tell because he has this really shiny metallic green color on a very hard shell! If you step on him, he makes a nice crunchy noise! They’re very loud when they fly through your living room, but dontcha worry kiddos, this little bugger is really harmless!.... Now this critter here, on the other hand (puts finger dangerously close to a pincher claw lookin’ thing…) – this here is a SCORPION. They won’t kill you, but their bite’ll hurt somethin’ fierce! Better check your slippers for these buggers when you put your tootsies in each mornin’!”

And what is it, really, about me (or is it people in general?): when one of the aforementioned critters breaks the rules and sets up shop nella casa (in the house): though I have an entire HOUSEHOLD of insect smashing items at my disposal; a veritable arsenal of bug-threatening weaponry... I always, out of habit - reach for the trusty ‘right shoe’ (as demonstrated just moments ago in the killing of my first two scorpions.) Yup, my loyal sidearm, always there -- even though it has the remains of many multi-legged creatures resting heavily on its sole. (pun completely irresistable!)

Okay, for you insects’ rights folks out there – and there MUST be some, I come from the Politically Correct Capital of the World… : I don’t kill the big ole’ shiny beetles, they’re too pretty and stupid and I mostly feel bad for their lot in life on this spin on the roulette wheel of evolution, reincarnation, or creation (something for all ye believers... ) I just help them back out the window. The scorpions? It's open season, big daddy!