In Honor of Sexually Frustrated Women Everywhere

I'm bound to offend someone here (what else is new?), but thank goodness I went to the grocery store yesterday, because today was yet another 'stealth holiday' here. They sneak up on me all the time. I'm sure people arriving in America think the same thing when we have, say, the ever-so-confusing Casmir Pulaski Day off (showing off my midwestern roots here). Whereas most American holidays have their roots in politics, most festa days here in Italy are church-based. Italy is still a fundamentally culturally religious country (birth of Catholicism and all that), although the majority of modern Italians are generally NOT practicing Catholics (or anything else that requires order and regulation). But, thousands of years of habits die hard and their culture is imbued and intertwined with the culture of the church, and besides - any excuse for a day off, right? And so it goes that EVERY day on my Italian calendar has the name of at least one saint's celebration attached to it. Today is red, meaning HOLIDAY!, and it's the Immacolata Concezione.

That reminds me of one of my favorite running jokes with the Old Soul, when I'm feeling hungover and queasy in the morning, usually on a road trip...

V: (turning a little green) "Oooooh. Not feeling so hot this morning. Maaaaaybe that last martini was a bad idea"
OS: "Then again, maybe you're pregnant"
V: "Oh, yeah. How f***ed up is the world if I'm the best candidate for the next immaculate conception?"

Cheers, Mary. This one's for you.


PS: I'm arguably decent at math, though I do keep PiGuy handy on my phone-a-friend list. But yasee, it's the 8th. And if memory serves, the birth of Jesus is celebrated on the 25th. Can any of my practicing religious friends out there enlighten me on what was obviously the worlds' shortest or longest human gestation period on record? Inquiring (if somewhat irreverent) minds ...